Each Family, house & child are all so different. Co-Sleeping, Bed-sharing, nursery, family rooms, separate beds for everyone.
I am writing this now because of this precious moment. A few nights ago this now 4 yr old snuck downstairs while I was watching TV (Heartland!) He didn't say a thing, just crawled up, and was out. I just stopped, paused the TV and snuggled into him, maybe it was the pregnancy hormones and shrinking lap space that stopped me. I was just so grateful to provide that safe space. Let me back up a little and share some of our family's sleep stories.
We started 10.5 years ago with our first son in the bassinet next to our bed for the first few months. (Photo, night one home, 3 days old) By 4 months he was in his crib in the room next to us, still waking every few hours. I would nurse him in the rocking chair and often wake up after falling asleep while feeding. It would scare me so much. Around his first birthday, he would respond to my husband's voice and a back rub to fall asleep, most of the time. (Photo of hubby in the crib) We night weaned at this point and he soon self weened during the day. This waking still went on through his second birthday. We then took the rail off the crib and eventually moved him into a double bed. It got entertaining, this sweet boy would still put himself to sleep, we would just get a surprise as to wear that was. (Photos) About 3 years old he started sneaking into our room at night. We moved the crib mattress onto our floor and he would help himself without waking us! He soon stopped coming in, until his baby brother was born and he wanted to be close again.
Our second son was SO different from the start, in every way. One thing I can tell you about kids, if you think you have figured out parenting, the next one will challenge you. He was in a bassinet next to us, co-sleeper "device" in the bed, sidecar crib next to our bed, in our bed... ANYTHING we could do to get him to sleep and often not the same thing more than once a day. We finally settled into a routine with bedsharing and sidecar crib, when the eldest wasn't in it trying to be close to baby. (Photos) This was 6.5 years after we swore we would never have kids in our bed and we were all 4 thriving off the family bed. Our second did not sleep more than the first but we all slept better without having to change positions or rooms multiple times a night. Even if it means some trapped naps. (Photos) or some silly napping spots. (Living room floor and cat basket photos) Just after his 2nd Birthday, he asked us to move into big brother's room. This was a few months after we night weaned, hoping it would lessen the night-waking (update, it didn't!). So we moved him onto the bottom bunk. This lasts for the beginning of the night, then he quietly sneaks in bed between us. Even at 4.5 This happens nearly every night still. We no longer have the room set up with the sidecar crib, not sure how this will play a role with the new baby coming and during a move too. I do know we will figure out something safe that works for number 3 and for our family to get the sleep we all need.
There are so many variations of normal, where you started may not be where you are now, or what you thought you would do is not what works for this child. Here are some articles I have found helpful over the years. I look forward to hearing about your experiences as well. What are your plans? What works for you? What have you learned since becoming a parent?
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